Pregnancy Gripe #1426

Ripped from

One thing that really sucks about pregnancy and post-pregnancy is the maternity bra. There’s probably no other thing that makes a woman feel 10 years older than a double-stitched, full cushion-covered, wide-strapped, grandma-laced, four-station buckle bra in BEIGE.

Sexy reds, french frills, sheer florals, two-toned lace, lush velvety blacks, little embroided gems, shimmery animal skins, tropical hibiscus ink prints, sleek thin straps? Ha. No way. You won’t find anything sexy in a maternity size 32DD.

Exciting maternity bra colours range from Apricot Pink to Cardboard Cream. Woohoo.

Some may argue the practicality factors – milk leakages, baby puke, blocked ducts, engorgement. And that we need the comfort and support. And really, what kind of animal skin print could put up with all that bleaching anyway?

I know it really is important to look after your breasts when you’re preggers – mastitis is an evil thing indeed. But damnit, I just want to wear a singlet top in this hot weather.