Thoughts on Parenting : Working vs Not Working

Wow. My baby is 3.5 months and I haven’t done any design work in ages!

The idea of me creating 5 design concepts in 3 hours seems soooo far away. Screen layouts and final concepts. Feels like an eternity ago! Deadlines, invoices, timesheets. In a previous life!

I’m almost scared to try, in case I discover that I’ve lost the ability to use that part of my brain. Or I’ve forgotten how to design, run a relatively savvy business AND be a hard-nosed career professional. It’s a scary thought.

Right now, my life is warm and fuzzy, in a world of Mr Spider, clapping songs and cloth nappies.

I guess it’s suddenly beginning to bug me. Having a kid at age 25, there are a few things I’ve had to come to terms with.

I’m having a hard time getting used to the fact that I’m not earning any money.

Each month passes and I wish that I could put a dollar value to the things I’ve done.

Not that it’s about the money. Rather, the worth of the work I’m doing. Because sometimes, when I’m in my trackies leaning over the laundry basin stirring a bucket of smelly nappies, I pause and think…

I find it hard to comprehend that I someone would pay me $50/hour for making silly graphical web banners, and NOTHING for this. I go back to stirring, slowly puzzling over which of the two is worse.

It also bugs me to watch the industry happily going about it’s business. Watching things change, trends move, technologies emerge. I feel like I’ve missed the bus or something.

I watch my colleagues and contemporaries develop and evolve. Their folios getting bigger. Experience ticking longer. I’m moving out of the loop so quickly. It scares me to think that I might be left on the corporate shelf.

On the other hand, I think I want a career change. I’d like to do something with a lot more soul. Something worthwhile, with purpose and value. I’d like to make a whole lot of good things happen.

I guess in the meantime I’ll be quite happy being a mum.

Absolutely Tasteless

I feel awful! My flu has developed into a nasty head cold. I’m stuffed and clogged and snotty and grumpy and headachey — and bloody hell my taste buds don’t work!!!!

I feel like I’ve rubbed my tongue dry on cardboard. Or like I’m constantly sucking on an old sock. I kept adding salt to my dinner and sugar to my tea. I just can’t taste anything! It’s soooo weird.

I ate half a packet of Caramel Tim Tams, before I realised that I was wasting them. My brain wasn’t receiving any warning messages about sugar overloads. It was quite distressing.

However I did learn a few things about the texture of food. Take away the taste and most foods feel gross in your mouth.

Munched up vegetables just feel like rubbery little blocks. Meat is like spongey orange peel.
Rice is just bean bag filling. And holy moly, ice cream is just strange! Like a creamy, wall plaster but cold!

I think chocolate was the only nicest thing that felt good in my mouth. Hard and solid, then melty and smooth, creamy and velvety.

I hope I feel better tomorrow. My mum promised to make me chicken soup.

Vegetable Tempura

In my efforts to cook and eat healthier meals, I’ve been trying some yummy recipes with no meat – on the menu last night was vegetarian tempura.

I don’t often cook deep fried meals. Mainly because of the amount of oil it requires. My mother used to have this old oil pot dedicated to deep frying. She used it over and over again. It was encrusted with old batter and had unidentifiable floaty bits. It was so gross.

Anyway, I was to reluctant use a lot of oil — so they turned out a little weird. Tasty. But weird. My husband said they tasted like vegetable doughnuts. Oh well. Next time I shall use more oil.

At The Supermarket

Callum is 3.5 months and has developed a vice like hand grip. Put something in his hand and you’ll never get it back! Fingers. Hair. Clothes. Toys. Ear rings.

Today I was in the supermarket aisle looking for soy sauce. I was carrying Callum on my hip. When I tried to walk away, I realised that Callum was holding onto something – a little old lady!

All three of us stood there politely, waiting for Cal to let go of her finger. It was a rather awkward 4 minutes.