It’s been a month since my last baby making post, and we’re still not pregnant.

In that time we managed to visit 3 different fertility clinics, and hear a variety of opinions on what we should do.

Interestingly, all three opinions were significantly different. We also learned a LOT about infertility, reasons for infertility and fertility treatments.

But basically, because of our case history, our choices came down to: IUI (Intra Uterine Insemination) or IVF (In-Vitro Fertilisation).

IUI is where they take some sperm and inject it directly into the uterus, at the woman’s most fertile moment. They work out the exact time with daily blood tests. Apart from the blood test, and a pap-smear like procedure, it’s not a very “invasive” process.

IVF is quite different. Basically, the woman has to have daily injections of hormones to produce a large number of eggs. It might not sound that bad, but this hormone therapy is famous to be utterly horrendous, brutal and atrocious on the woman. Huge, scary mood swings for a couple of weeks. Ugh!

The eggs are then harvested in an operation. The eggs are fertilised in a laboratory (hence the term “test tube” babies). Embryos are created. Some might be frozen. And depending on certain policies, the embryo (or two or three) will be inserted into the woman’s uterus, where hopefully it finds a nice place to grow into a baby.

IVF is much more expensive, complicated and invasive – but also much more likely to result in a pregnancy.

So again, we have lots to consider.

We’re thinking that we’ll try the conservative option first – IUI.

I’ll let you know how it works out!

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Click here to see the whole story of Making Baby 3.

Today I spoke to my doctor about not being able to fall pregnant.

My doctor is by far, the most wonderful, most considerate, personal and straight-forward doctor that I, and my husband, have ever had. We’ve been seeing her for 7 years, and she knows all about us and the kids.

I told her about our efforts in trying to fall pregnant and the techniques we’ve tried. I laid out a little case history, how we’ve come to this point, and where we’d like to go.

I asked her for her opinion, to recommend some fertility clinics, and any other reproductive alternatives she can think of.

I asked her, “We’ve only been trying for seven months. Would a fertility clinic take us seriously?”

She assured me that since we know my husband has a low sperm count, 7 months is long enough to be taken seriously.

Phew. The last thing I want I to do is pay a specialist to tell me to just keep trying for another 6 months.

My husband, with his years of dealing with doctors, medical practices and the health sector, strongly believes in being deeply involved in your treatment. He believes in finding out as much as you can, doing vigorous research, looking for alternatives, asking hard questions, asking WHY, and hearing as many different opinions as possible. He believes in “getting three quotes”.

I personally had the impression that we should trust doctors, that ALL doctors know what they are doing, and they will recommend the best possible solution for the patient – but I have since found out that this isn’t always the case.

Each specialist doctor, like a tradesperson, has a particular style and way of doing things. They are most likely to recommend the method that they are expert in, and it might not necessarily be the way that is best for you.

So while most people go see ONE fertility clinic at a time, we are booked into seeing THREE – just for an initial consultation with each.

Ok perhaps it’s a bit of an overkill. The Chinese in me is very grumpy about the money we’re spending just for having a chat with a doctor – especially if they all say the same thing – but I’ve been told, “Hey, welcome to the world of assisted reproduction!”

Assisted reproduction! Fertility specialists! How scary!

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Click here to see the whole story of Making Baby 3.

It’s been seven months since we started trying to conceive. And we have had seven months of lonely, one-pink lines.

Yep, we’re still not pregnant.

So my husband went to get his sperm checked again.

Last time he had it checked, we were very optimistic because, while he had a low sperm count, the sperm had high motility (moving and swimming sperm).

This meant it was still possible to get pregnant, and also possible that his count would improve over time.

But it seems not to be the case. The sperm count is still very low.

To put things into perspective, we are pretty damn lucky that my husband is even ALIVE after having cancer, and to NOT be seriously handicapped by chemotherapy and multiple surgeries. So having a low sperm count seems like a lucky escape.

His doctors are now of the opinion that this low sperm count is permanent, and while it remains technically possible to get pregnant, it is also highly unlikely. We could be trying for 7 years!

And so now we have to decide what to do.

Do we investigate medical treatment options?

Or just be happy with the two beautiful boys we are already blessed with?

Lots to think about.

…

Click here to see the whole story of Making Baby 3.

Upon turning 3 years old, my son has blissfully turned my living room into a fully decked-out, preschooler-boy’s dream pad. The place is spilling over with new birthday toys.

Robots, cars sets, pirate sets, train tracks, Lego sets, Buzz Lightyear action figures, and so much more.

And just to make things worse, we’re having a 5 year old birthday party for my older boy in a few weeks. I’m shuddering at the thought of all the toys at the end of the day.

So a few days ago, I told my boys that we were going to have a TOY CLEAN UP DAY. We would sort through the toys, clean them up, and donate some to charity – to kids who can’t afford to have ANY toys.

They seemed to be quite happy with that idea.

So we cracked open the old toy box.

One by one, we pulled out the forgotten, dusty, old toys. All the old favourites! There were pop up toys. Chunky trains. Wire bead things. A xylophone. Wooden cups. Coloured cups. Squeaky toys. Shakers. Rattles.

They were actually in great condition! A bit of polish and they’d be as good as new!

But it struck me that these toys were baby toys.

And aren’t we trying to have another baby? What’s Baby 3 going to play with?

I part of me desperately wants to get rid of all these baby toys. Cleanse the house of unwanted junk. Move on. Free up some space.

But part of me wants to be fair. If my first two boys had age appropriate toys, then why can’t Baby 3 have them too?

So the boxes of baby toys stay.

Waiting to be opened. Hopefully soon.

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Click here to see the whole story of Making Baby 3.

I was flicking through a rather encyclopediatic looking fertility book, when something caught my eye.

“Alternative Lubrication”

Uh-oh.

It is commonly known that many forms of artificial lubrication can hinder or kill sperm – such as petroleum jelly, oil-based lubricants, baby oils, vegetable oils, glycerine, even saliva.

So the book suggests that you should use RAW EGGWHITE.

Apparently eggwhite is a suitable, vaginal lubricant that may assist conception and is least harmful to sperm.

1) Try not to use eggs which are straight from the fridge.

2) Separate the yolk from the eggwhite.

3) Apply where necessary.

So there you go.

Other medical experts caution the use of eggwhite as a lubricant, as there is a slight possibility it might contain the salmonella bacteria.

They classify it as an “old wives tale” and “only for recreation”.

So I guess chocolate sauce, strawberry ice cream and whipped yoghurt is definitely out of the question?

…

Click here to see the whole story of Making Baby 3.

I thought that stress was a major cause for being unable to fall pregnant. I thought it was common knowledge.

The medical community acknowledges that stress affects women’s menstruation, in different ways.

And they also state that when “stress-reduction techniques” are applied, some women have been able to conceive when they originally could not.

But other than that, there is not enough scientific evidence to support that stress causes infertility.

Now I don’t think I’m a stressful person. And I don’t think I lead a stressful life.

So I usually glaze over the section where is says : Trying to fall pregnant? Reduce the stress in your life! Go for a walk! Take a bath! Read a book! Pick up a new hobby!

Doesn’t apply to me!

But I was talking to a doctor friend of mine, who was a lot more open minded towards holistic medicine and wellbeing.

She asked me to check my dates from when I first started trying to conceive, “How long are your cycles?”

I almost brushed her off, thinking that small irregularities in my cycle were not much of a concern to me. After all, everyone’s irregular. But I went home and I counted up all my dates, including before trying to conceive.

28. 28. 28. 29. 29. 30. 29. 32. 33.

Oh wow. My cycles are getting longer. Geez.

I guess getting all stressed out about trying NOT to be stressed!

Time to take a bath!

…

Click here to see the whole story of Making Baby 3.

When we first tried to conceive our first baby in 2002, I was completely clueless. I didn’t know much about being pregnant and what to expect.

I didn’t know any first time mums, I didn’t know how to look after a baby and I didn’t know anything about typical child development. I didn’t know there was a term called “stay at home mum” and I didn’t know there was such a thing as a “healthy pregnancy”.

We conceived in our first month of trying, and I realised that I wasn’t completely ready to be pregnant. I had to learn everything as I went along - through reading books, magazines, talking to nurses, doctors, and other mothers.

It was only after I conceived, that I read about the things you should do to get your body ready for pregnancy. I was struck with the fact that I was pretty naive and ill-prepared, and it drove me to do something about it.

All the reading, research, and doing positive things towards my pregnancy really prepared me physically and mentally for the big day. It helped me feel more in control and confident, and less fearful and uncertain.

Experts recommend that if you are thinking of having a baby, you should do the following things to get your body ready for a healthy pregnancy:

Have a medical check up.
Your doctor is probably the best place to start. He or she will be able to discuss your individual medical history, circumstances, and put you on the right track.

Give up smoking, alcohol and drugs.
Research shows that smoking, high consumption of alcohol and the use of hard drugs can increase the risks in pregnancy, birth defects, development problems, disabilities, to name a few.

Get regular exercise.
A fit, healthy mother has a higher chance of having a healthy pregnancy.

Watch your weight
If you’re over weight, you may have an increased risk in developing high blood pressure, diabetes and other complications during pregnancy.

Eat a healthy and balanced diet.
Try to stay off junk food and food high in salt, fat and sugar. Eat lots of vegetables, wholegrains, fruits, milk, making sure you get lots of the following vitamins:

Folic acid is important for the development of your baby’s brain and spinal cord.

Calcium is important for your baby’s growing bones, your own bone health, and to guard against calcium deficiency.

Iron is needed for your baby’s growth, and he/she will deplete your supply, leaving you tired and anaemic.

Fibre will help you maintain a healthy bowel, as most pregnant women experience constipation.

Reduce exposure to chemicals and pesticides
Eg. Weed killers, harsh cleaning fluids, and vapours from chemicals may effect your baby’s development.

Organise health insurance.
Doing a bit of research and organising your health insurance might save you money and headaches in the near future.

(We got caught out! We forgot to switch from a young couple’s insurance plan to a young family plan. Oh well.)

Take care of your emotional health.
I think this one is most important, and I stuck it in here (even though I’m not an expert). I really believe that you and your partner should talk about and enjoy the process of pregnancy and parenting together! Also establishing a network of family and friends who can support you is invaluable!

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Click here to see the whole story of Making Baby 3.

When you’re trying to conceive a child, it’s very hard to NOT think about it in your day to day life

Even while I have two kids, it’s always at the back of my head.

As I go through the day, I am constantly struck by the thought : I wonder what it’d be like to have a third kid in this situation.

When I push a shopping trolley loaded with my kids. When we’re at a cafe sharing chips and milkshakes. When we’re paddling and splashing in a swimming pool. When we huddle together to take a family photo.

It’s a consuming thought.

But I shouldn’t let it be that way. Not in a negative way, at least.

I always try to keep a positive and healthy attitude about it all.

I like to focus on the good and happy things in my life.

I like to speak, think and write about it in a positive way.

I like to laugh about it, telling people, “That’s right, we have lots and lots and lots of sex.”

I like to keep some perspective, remembering that there are so many couples who want and can’t have even one child.

I like to think that in the end, if it’s not to be, then I shall be happy with what I have.

If anything, I guess thinking happy thoughts and trying to stay positive will keep me less stressed, relaxed, in the mood and who knows what might happen next!

…
Click here to see the whole story of Making Baby 3.

It’s month 5, and I’m not pregnant again. Ah, oh well.

I found some interesting statistics to mull over.

  Of couples trying to conceive naturally -

20 % will conceive within one month
70 % will conceive within six months
85 % will conceive within a year
90 % will conceive within 18 months
95 % will conceive within two years

  At the age of 25, a woman’s fertility begins to naturally decline. It decreases rapidly after the age of 35.

  At the age of 30, a healthy woman has a 20% chance of falling pregnant each month. A 40 year old woman has a 5% chance.

  It is estimated that 1 in 7 couples have difficulty conceiving.

  Percentage of births born to an age group are:
5.1% - 19 & under
16.8% - 20-24
30.2% - 25-29
31.0% - 30-34
14.1% - 35-39
2.7% - 40 & over

According to HFEA (Human Fertilisation & Embryology Authority) 2005.
Australian Institute of Health and Welfare in May 2003
American Society for Reproductive Medicine. Age and Fertility. 2003.

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Click here to see the whole story of Making Baby 3.

I have a confession to make.

One of the more accurate ways of predicting ovulation is to use an ovulation test kit. And ever since we’ve started trying to “Make Baby 3”, I’ve been using these kits.

Ovulation test kits are generally 99% accurate in predicting ovulation. However they don’t guarantee that you will conceive.

It measures the amount of LH (luteinising hormone) in your urine, which increases 1-2 days before you ovulate. So the surge of this hormone indicates that your fertile days are approaching.

The kit works like a pregnancy test kit – peeing on a stick, or dipping test strips in a cup. It’s pretty easy to use: when you see TWO dark lines, you shag like crazy for 2 days.

Ovulation kits are a bit more expensive than the [free] natural charting methods like tracking cervical mucus and taking your basal body temperature. I buy mine from the supermarket for $25 for 7 tests. But I’ve seen some packs sell for $75.

When trying to conceive a girl, you’re supposed to have sex 2-3 days before ovulation.

So basically the idea is, you start tracking your cycle with ovulation tests 4-5 days before you think you’ll ovulate. Meanwhile you have lots of sex. When you get an LH SURGE, you stop having sex. And hopefully a stronger, longer lasting, female sperm will make it to the egg first.

While I’ve heard all kinds of positive and negative stories about this method and how it’s actually much more tricker than it’s made out to be…

I’ve been told by my doctor that this method may decrease our chances of falling pregnant at all. And I guess for us, this definitely seems to be the case.

…
Click here to see the whole story of Making Baby 3.

Over the past months of trying to conceive, I’ve poured through heaps of fertility and conception books. I thought I would share some of the more excellent books I have found.

How To Choose The Sex Of Your Baby by LB Shettles and D Rorvik.

This book begins with a bit of history on the Shettles Method and perhaps a few too many testimonials – if anything, the testimonials made me feel that I wasn’t the only nutcase who was using this technique!

The book runs through the scientific evidence, how the method has been developed and refined over the years. It’s got some interesting sex selection stories from the ancient Greeks, middle ages and sex chants made by German woodsmen - if you’re into that kind of thing.

It compares the Shettles Method to a few other sex selection methods, including gender diets and emerging high-tech methods.

Then the juicy bit is in the chapter “How to Use the Shettles Method Successfully”. Where it covers how to determine the time of ovulation, what to do when you are trying for a boy and trying for a girl. Lots of questions and answers too.

It’s all very interesting, detailed and practical. Perhaps the language is a bit long-winded and at times scientific, but the information is excellent, especially if you want to give this method a go.

On the back cover is states that the Shettles Method raises your chances of conceiving a child of your preferred gender from 50% – if you do nothing at all – to 75% if you use the method properly. Some researchers report that the success rate is as high as 90%.

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Click here to see the whole story of Making Baby 3.

It’s been 4 months since I’ve started writing this “Making Baby 3” series. And many people have asked me whether I would consider adoption.

If I had been asked before I had my own kids, I probably would have been very hesitant. I would probably want to try to naturally conceive (for a few years). Or try other artificial means of conception first.

If I had no kids, if I knew for sure that I couldn’t have kids of my own, then my answer would be yes.

Why? Because I have always wanted children. I have always wanted to be a parent and to have a family.

And now, I also know the happiness a child can bring. I know the joy of parenting and how it completely outweighs the headaches of parenting. It is so completely worth it.

However, I appreciate that the adoption process is a long and difficult journey. Sometimes the process can take as long as 4-7 years. Which is the main reason we won’t be looking to adopt our third baby.

I know 4 families living in my neighbourhood with adopted children. Two of the children were locally born. Two were from overseas. Talking to the families and hearing their adoption stories, is just so interesting, remarkable, moving and humbling.

Adopting parents have to pay, attend seminars, fill out countless forms, go through interviews, psychological examinations, give proof of the strength of their relationship, character assessments, prove that you can meet the ethnic / cultural / educational needs of the child, continual visits from social workers… in order to have a child.

Us? We just have sex! And bingo we’re parents. No course. No handbook. No application form.

Beyond the exhausting experience, the mums I have talked to and who have adopted, all say the same thing, it’s so completely worth it.

…

Click here to see the whole story of Making Baby 3.

We’re up to our 4th month, and we’re not pregnant.

It’s true. I’m pretty down about it. I’m not in a total state of despair and disappointment, but I do need some cheering up.

This following “list” is an email someone sent me a while ago. I thought it was pretty funny. It doesn’t have much to do with MAKING a baby.

But it applies to me and my wish to HAVE A THIRD BABY.

……………………………………..

The Evolution of Parenthood

Your Clothes -

1st baby: You begin wearing maternity clothes as soon as your OB/GYN confirms your pregnancy.

2nd baby: You wear your regular clothes for as long as possible.

3rd baby: Your maternity clothes are your regular clothes.

The Baby’s Name -

1st baby: You pore over baby-name books and practice pronouncing and writing combinations of all your favourites.

2nd baby: Someone has to name their kid after your great-aunt Mavis, right? It might as well be you.

3rd baby: You open a name book, close your eyes, and see where your finger falls. Bimaldo? Perfect!

Preparing for the Birth -

1st baby: You practice your breathing religiously.

2nd baby: You don’t bother practicing because you remember that last time, breathing didn’t do a thing.

3rd baby: You ask for an epidural in your 8th month.

The Layette -

1st baby: You pre-wash your newborn’s clothes, color-coordinate them, and fold them neatly in the baby’s little bureau.

2nd baby: You check to make sure that the clothes are clean and discard only the ones with the darkest stains.

3rd baby: Boys can wear pink, can’t they?

Pacifier -

1st baby: If the pacifier falls on the floor, you put it away until you can go home and wash and boil it.

2nd baby: When the pacifier falls on the floor, you squirt it off with some juice from the baby’s bottle.

3rd baby: You wipe it off on your shirt and pop it back in.

Diapering -

1st baby: You change your baby’s diapers every hour, whether they need it or not.

2nd baby: You change their diaper every 2 to 3 hours, if needed.

3rd baby: You try to change their diaper before others start to complain about the smell or you see it sagging to their knees.

Worries -

1st baby: At the first sign of distress - a whimper, a frown - you pick up the baby.

2nd baby: You pick the baby up when her wails threaten to wake your firstborn.

3rd baby: You teach your 3-year-old how to rewind the mechanical swing.

Activities -

1st baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics, Baby Swing, and Baby Story Hour.

2nd baby: You take your infant to Baby Gymnastics.

3rd baby: You take your infant to the supermarket and the dry cleaner.

Going Out -

1st baby: The first time you leave your baby with a sitter, you call home 5 times.

2nd baby: Just before you walk out the door, you remember to leave a number where you can be reached.

3rd baby: You leave instructions for the sitter to call only if she sees blood.

At Home -

1st baby: You spend a good bit of every day just gazing at the baby.

2nd baby: You spend a bit of every day watching to be sure your older child isn’t squeezing, poking, or hitting the baby.

3rd baby: You spend a little bit of every day hiding from the children.

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Click here to see the whole story of Making Baby 3.

In my investigations into all the ways of increasing my chances to have a girl, I stumbled across some expensive, high-tech, scientific gender selection methods that GUARANTEE A SPECIFIC GENDER.

They all involve artificial means of conception and pregnancy, usually used by couples who can’t have children any other way.

While these techniques have worked for many couples, most are extremely expensive and can not guarantee the pregnancy or birth of the baby.

MicroSort Sperm Sorting
Sperm are sorted into X and Y, then used via artificial insemination (IUI) or in-vitro fertilization (IVF) to become pregnant. Apparently there’s a 91% success rate for having a girl and 76% for a boy.

Pre-implantation Genetic Diagnosis (PGD)
Using PGD for gender selection is 100% guaranteed, however it is banned in some countries.

PGD was actually developed for couples with fatal genetic conditions, and it allowed couples to test IVF embryos for genetic disorders, before being implanted into the mother.

But there are some places that allow PGD for gender selection in non-medical circumstances.

The Ericsson Method
This method is similar to sperm sorting, using a kind of filter. It is less expensive and lower accuracy.

As I read articles about these procedures I was also faced with countless discussions about ethics, social implications, religious concerns, possible biological or psychological harm to children etc.

For me, I haven’t really considered these methods at all. They seem like such distant and extreme choices. It makes me wonder, how far would I go to be guaranteed a girl?

…

Click here to see the whole story of Making Baby 3.

When you’re trying to conceive a baby, the woman has to work out when she ovulates in order to find her most fertile days.

There are quite a few easy and free methods to predict ovulation. I’ve already written about charting a Cervical Mucus Chart, and it’s often recommended to try charting your Basal Body Temperature at the same time.

Basal Body Temperature (BBT)

The BBT is the body’s temperature when it is at rest. When you chart your BBT everyday, you can work out where you are in your cycle, and exactly when ovulation has occurred.

You have to take your temperature first thing in the morning (before you even speak), and at the same time each morning for a month.

Basically when you have a spike in your temperature, it indicates that you have ovulated. It also means that you are most fertile on the two to three days BEFORE the spike.

It all sounds very easy, but unfortunately it calls for scientific procedures that are much too tricky for me – that is, doing something brainy first thing in the morning.

I can hardly remember where I am and what my name is the moment I wake up.

Nonetheless. I have tried it, and yes I plot a good looking chart.

I’m aware that it doesn’t work for everybody, especially if you have a very irregular cycle, or if you’re sick etc. It’s also pretty time consuming, tricky to get it right and most professionals say women shouldn’t rely on it 100%.

However I found myself quite fascinated as I looked at my little chart.

This is because I also jotted down other regular patterns like: days when I’m depressed, days when my skin feels like crap, days when my hair is really shiny, days when I’m super energetic, days when I crave junk food, days when I’m snappy + irritable. And it’s actually quite freaky to see how predictable I am.

This is not my chart, but it gives you a really good idea of what a BBT chart looks like. You can read about how to chart your basal body temperature here.

Original image by GlobalB2B.

Being ethnically Chinese, I grew up being taught Chinese traditions and ideas. But growing up in Australia, I’ve learnt that my parents hacked away at some traditions and just made up stuff along the way.

Thus I’ve been always very dubious when something is labelled, an “Ancient Chinese Tradition.” What it usually meant was that Mrs Lee told my mother something over the mahjong table one rainy evening.

Anyway. When I gave birth to both my children, my mother insisted I carry out the Ancient Chinese Tradition of Chinese Confinement.

It involves sticking to weird rules like – stay in the house for 30 days, avoid washing your hair and hands, don’t touch cold water, and drink lots of brandy. Ok I exaggerate. But you can read what I wrote about it here. I didn’t do very well, but at least I tried.

During my research on how to increase chances of selecting gender using natural techniques, I came across the Ancient Chinese Gender Chart.

The legend states that the Chinese Gender Chart is over 700 years old. It was discovered in a royal tomb in Beijing and now resides in the Beijing Institute of Science. Apparently it is 90 – 99% accurate, but it is only for entertainment purposes.

There isn’t much scientific evidence, but some say it has something to do with the phase of the moon and the acidity in the woman’s uterus.

How To Use It :

You can predict your child’s gender by using your LUNAR AGE at the time of conception. (To work out your lunar age, just add 2 years.)

Then find which month you conceived, then you can work out the gender of your baby.

My Analysis :

My biggest problem right now is… for me and my two boys = this chart is 100% accurate.

The chart ALSO tells me that I have to wait until May if I want to conceive a girl.

Hmmm.

…

Click here to see the whole story of Making Baby 3.

We’ve been 3 months into this baby making business, and again, we are not pregnant.

I have received quite a few emails from people suggesting that I could try changing my diet.

A quick search on the internet shows that there are different diets that will increase chances of conceiving a girl or boy.

Some diets are loosely based on “studies”, while others have absolutely no basis whatsoever. Some just sound plain dodgy and contradicting. And each come with a warning “please consult your doctor before adjusting your diet”.

This is the summary of what I dug up.

Diet to conceive a girl : the woman should eat foods high in calcium and magnesium. Some foods suggested are yoghurt, milk, eggs, nuts, brown rice, wholemeal bread, spinach and tofu.

Minimise intake of sodium and potassium. Eg. salty foods, tea, coffee, wine, fish fingers, cheese, oranges, and peaches.

Diet to conceive a boy : the woman should consume food high in sodium and potassium. Eg. Salty foods, dried apricots, raisins, meat, fish, jams, dried vegetables.

Minimise intake of calcium and magnesium.

I suppose there’s no real harm in trying it.

But I believe having a balanced and wholesome diet should be more important for the mother and father. So I probably won’t be committed to any special diets. If anything I’ll eat an extra slice of tofu and take an extra handful of nuts.

…

Click here to see the whole story of Making Baby 3.

In our quest to have a third baby, my husband and I decided that, since we already have two boys, there was no harm in trying to conceive a girl – or rather, using natural techniques that increased the chances of conceiving a girl.

We’ve been following various recommendations outlined in a popular technique called The Shettles Method, by Dr Shettles in her book, How To Choose the Sex Of Your Baby.

I’ve already written about the importance of timing sex, tracking your mucus cycle.

So according to the Shettles method, if you want a girl, you have to have sex in a particular way.

1) Shallow penetration.

Woman on the bottom. Good. Old. Missionary. Just lie still thanks.

The reason for having shallow penetration is so that the sperm will be deposited further away from the cervix, which is more acidic and will disadvantage the weaker boy sperm.

Plus it also gives the slow swimming, but longer lasting girl sperm a greater chance of reaching the egg.

2) Woman can NOT orgasm.

Apparently, when a woman orgasms, the acidity levels change in the uterus, making it more favourable for boy sperm.

Also the contractions felt during an orgasm usually assist the sperm up into the cervix and towards the egg. This means the faster swimming boy sperm have an advantage over the girl sperm.

So there you have it.

If you want a girl, you have to have BORING SEX!

…

(I wonder what it means that I have two boys! Ha!)

Click here to see the whole story of Making Baby 3.

I have two happy, healthy boys. They are active, loud, cute, funny, creative, weird and I just love them to bits.

Yet as my husband and I decided that we were going to begin trying to conceive our third child, we made it no secret that we wanted to try for a girl.

Now, I’m not announcing it as my original gender preference. Nor is it a reflection of how I feel about raising my boys.

I feel it is so natural to have one gender, and wish for a different set of experiences that can only come about from the relationship with the opposite gender.

It’s simply a little wish.

Because in all honesty, I don’t have a deep, intense, emotional yearning to have a GIRL. I don’t have a lifelong desire to brush hair, tie ponytails, fiddle with dresses and tiaras.

I won’t be disappointed or broken-hearted if I my third child turns out to be boy.

I would be thrilled, overjoyed and pleased beyond anything to have another boy!

And I feel that’s the right and healthy way to approach all this.

After all, the chances are 50/50 right?

Click here to see the whole story of Making Baby 3.

Image from Medgadget

The other week I wrote about how my preferred sperm donor went to get a sperm analysis and we discovered that he had a very low sperm count.

A normal guy has around 20 million or more sperm in 1ml of semen. Anything less than this is considered to be “low”.

A bit of research shows that it is quite common for men to have a low sperm count, and there are so many reasons why this might happen.

Even the simplest, most basic thing can affect a man’s fertility – his age, his stress levels, his general health, nutrient deficiencies, obesity, overheating, smoking, alcohol, cycling, genetics, free radicals, and the general pollution in the environment!

In most cases, it’s pretty difficult to pinpoint exactly what is the main cause and know what to prescribe in order to increase sperm levels.

Added to this problem, sperm is formed about 3 months before it is actually ejaculated. So if you want to know the cause of your low sperm count, you have to know what you were doing 3 months ago.

Therefore, if you’re a guy and you want your little guys (and girls) to have a greater chance of surviving when they are finally let loose – it’s probably a good idea to make positive changes to your lifestyle NOW!

Plus, if you’re an overweight, meat-eating, stressed-out cyclist, you’d probably be better off doing some swimming and taking a chill pill.

Some unproven old wives tales suggest that men should take cooler baths, no long bike rides, get lots of sleep, less caffeine, take vitamins, no tight jeans, and try to wear loose fitting underwear like boxer shorts, or crotchless underwear.

By the way, please remember that I’m not a medical expert, and that it takes just one sperm to make a baby. AND I’m kidding about the crotchless underwear, unless you’re into that kind of thing – in which case it may probably help you get pregnant!

Anyone know where to buy really “cool” men’s underwear?

Click here to see the whole story of Making Baby 3.

Image from Joe Rivettto