day of week

Missing Dad

27 June 2011

Missing Dad

My husband is currently away on a 3.5 week overseas trip to Scotland. He has been gone for 3 weeks… with only 5 days left before he comes back!

It’s the longest time my children have been without their dad… and they are missing him a lot. A few tears have been shed, and there’s a general low mood in the house in the evenings.

We have had lots of communication with him – phone calls, texts, emails and postcards – so that has helped a lot.

Their behaviour has been pretty much the same. Their daily routine is also the same.

If anything, my two older children (8yo and 6yo) have been doing a lot more work around the house. They help me vacuum the floor, put dishes away, put their laundry away, tidy up the outside area, tidy their rooms, and tidy up the play room at the end of every day.

I’ve been pretty strict with them. The poor kids don’t get any sweet treats (including NO HONEY on their cereal) until their jobs are done.

In turn, I give them a bit more independence (and a bit more time with their computer games).

And it’s been quite nice. It’s like having 2 young men look after me.

My youngest child is a bit clingy though. He probably understands what’s going on to a certain degree. Beyond that, he just wants to be cuddled a lot.

Missing Dad

But the biggest question everyone is asking is – “How are you coping with THREE KIDS Karen??“

Honestly, things have been going fine. I’ve been managing everything quite well. I just get on with life, really.

During the day, I’m very busy. I go out a lot, I look after my youngest kid – so it’s as if my husband was at work anyway.

After school is usually the hardest part of the day. My parents have been coming over everyday for 1 or 2 hours to help me. They bring afternoon tea, they bring makings for dinner, they bring eggs and fresh fruit, hot croissants and homemade chicken pies, they bring smiles and new stories to share. They have been an absolute blessing.

In the evenings, I help the kids with homework, I bath them, we do reading or some other activity, we clean and tidy the house.

Once the kids are in bed, I usually wash the dishes, clean the kitchen, and tackle some laundry.

After that, when the house is all quiet, I have to admit that I do get a bit lonely.

Sure it’s nice to have the whole evening to myself – to do WHATEVER I WANT. To read, to blog, to watch tv, to surf the internet til 1am in the morning…

But after a week of it… being by myself sucks.

I know myself. And I know I need some kind of emotional support and connection to keep me sane.

So on top of all this, I have been making a HUGE EFFORT (so much so, that it’s almost ridiculous) to keep my weekly schedule full and very social.

I set up play dates with girlfriends, organise girl-night-outs on the weekends, have lots of dinners with friends, manicure nights, movie nights and more. I have some big event every day, and haha it’s been great!

So with 5 days to go, I look back and try to sum up the experience…

I feel happy, tired, lonely, and very proud that I’m managing it all so well.