On my 29th birthday I was surprised by my own powerful emotions towards turning 30.

I wrote a post about it and many people of different ages and backgrounds have responded with their personal stories, thoughts and reflections on “Turning 30”. Here are a selection for you to read…

I’ve started with Shay’s, which is quite long, but so powerful and beautifully written. Thanks to everyone who has contributed. I’ve certainly been reflecting on what people are sharing.

I’d still love to hear more so if you’d like to share your own Turning 30 story, please email me using my contact form.

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Shay, 30, Australia

I’m sitting here on the eve of my 30th birthday with all sorts of mixed feelings.

I’ve been a bit close to tears all day. At first I thought it was PMS because that always makes me emotional, but as the day wore on, I realised I had this feeling once before - on the eve of my wedding.

It’s kind of like a grieving for the loss of the old me. Saying goodbye to a part of me, and moving on with the next phase in life.

Maybe the feeling is just a realisation that I’m a grown-up now. When I was a kid, 30 was old! As a kid, you can’t wait to be a teenager. In your teens, you can’t wait to be an adult. At 18, you can’t wait to be 21, but after that, no-one says they can’t wait to be 30.

I guess by 30 you’re expected to be well on your way to your path in life. It’s about meeting expectations, yours and others. Whether by now you should be settled down, have a great career, a mortgage, family or savings in the bank.

It’s a reflective age. It makes you look back and think about your achievements (or lack of) and whether or not you are where you thought you would be at 30. Time to pull your finger out and get your shit together if you haven’t already.

I took a look in the mirror today - nude. It’s the only way to be brutally honest with yourself. I have more crow’s feet than I thought I would, but I have a lot of character in my face. My boobs aren’t as perky as they used to be - I’m probably carrying 5kgs more than I’d like to and I have stretch marks on my belly - but I have a beautiful daughter to show for it.

Overall, I think I look pretty good for 30. Let’s face it - I may never look great in a bikini again, but that won’t stop me from wearing one.

But if I were say 18, and could see myself now, would I be satisfied with how I turned out?

I had a tumultuous childhood, ran amok in my teens & early 20’s, tried drugs, had unprotected sex, behaved irresponsibly. But I’ve come full circle. I’m happily married, and have a great kid, a mortgage and a great job. I’ve travelled Australia, had some amazing experiences, overcome obstacles, and have a whole future ahead of me with hopefully at least another 30 years. I think if I could see myself now at 18, I would be pretty proud of how far I have come.

I am who I am because of the last 30 years - its up to me now how I turn out. I think that the older you get, the closer you become to the ‘real you’. You have less time for bullshit and more appreciation for the little things.

Someone said to me recently, “It’s not about counting the years, but making the years count” and I think that will become my mantra.

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Gina, 31, Singapore
http://ggbabe.blogspot.com

I’ve always had a mental image that I would be happy, successful and financially independent by the time I turned 30. Maybe because my family was always struggling to make ends meet, so I knew that I want to live differently.

I started working at 19 and had led a wild life. By the time I was 25, I travelled to most parts of the world, alone, for work, and with friends. Plus I chalked up debts on my credit cards.

I had birthday depression all through my 20s because I felt I had not accomplished anything and was nowhere near my target for 30 yrs old.

When I turned 30 last year, I was free from credit card debt, had a stable job which I enjoyed and was planning for my wedding in the same year. It was one of the best years of my life. Since then, I’ve never looked back!

I LOVE being in my 30s!! To me, it signifies that you’re truly an adult, totally independent and is accountable for your own actions. I love that!

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Irene, 30, France
http://irenenam.squarespace.com

I always thought that by the time I was thirty I would have a lot of things figured out.

I realize that I don’t. Yet wearing the necklace and hair clips that my sons have secretly bought with their father and kept hidden under their pillows suddenly gives new meaning to all the questions that are left unanswered.

And gently reminds me that I have time to learn my lessons, to be confident in my tastes and views.

And find out who I am.

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Kim, 35, USA
http://eskimobliss.com

When I turned 29 I got my first tattoo. I do think it was motivated a bit by rebellion; I never went through a teenage rebellious stage growing up; I think it hit me very late in life. Over the next couple of years I found myself feeling more and more like I had settled into a role that just wasn’t me. I wasn’t necessarily unhappy, just discontent.

I was 30, and I found myself constantly thinking “this is it?”

I tried to just ignore it but eventually the feeling was so great that I couldn’t sleep and I lost weight. It was then that I started realizing just how much it was interfering with my life, and decided to leave my husband, a few months before my 31st birthday (that’s a very condensed version of the drama I was going through at the time).

So yeah, I think turning the big 3-0 can definitely have a huge impact. I’d advise anyone in their twenties to get their rebelliousness out of the way, instead of waiting until they get married or “have more of a settled life”.

I’ve only recently began to feel what it’s like to be somewhat settled again. Now, at 35, being a 30something is actually an OK feeling.

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Sharon, 51, USA
http://sharonsimoncini.typepad.com

Turning 30 isn’t scary … turning 51 is!!

Scary is when you see a cute guy on TV and you realize that he’s young enough to be your son!

Or you see an “old” person somewhere …and then you find out that he/she was born the same year as you. THAT’S SCARY!

Every phase of life brings interesting challenges and levels of self-awareness. I’m a graphic designer, lived in NYC for 15 years, travelled around Europe and had a fun, carefree life for a long time.

When I turned 50 - I realized that my reality was a suburban New Jersey (USA) housewife driving a suburban SUV. But I have LOTS to be thankful for … so I focus on that everyday.

Enjoy your life, your family and your age. Before you know it … decades pass by!!

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Si, 32, USA
http://www.youmeandfivebucks.com

There is an unwritten cardinal rule that you never ask a woman her age. I used to think that was ridiculous. But in just the last few years, I’ve begun to understand.

Maybe it’s because almost all my friends - who are younger than me - keep complaining that they’re getting old?

Maybe it’s because my body has a little more kinks and knots these days?

Or maybe it’s because people have started calling me Ma’am. When did I become a Ma’am?

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Joh, 40+, Australia
http://www.johblogs.com/2007/07/with-hindsight-30-was.html

Even when I turned 40 I still felt like a kid.

I don’t think age is about feeling a certain way. I did have expectations of having my act together when I was 30. I felt like a failure in so many ways and I didn’t match up to my vision for 30. I started to feel that it was time to take my life a lot more seriously and that I had to stop fluffing around.

But turning 40 was bliss in comparison. I not only felt pleased with my life but had the perspective of how painful it had been only 10 years ago to amplify my gratitude. I feel like I am now living the best years of my life. I know you can decide this at any time.

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Marcus, 33, Australia
http://mooiness.com
(my only male submission so far)

The concept of age is different for women, especially to those who want children. To me it’s really just a number. From the age of 25/26 till I was 30, I have not changed much. I have settled into the person that I am now.

My views on life were the same and still are - I cherish the important things such as family and good friends. I enjoy the simple pleasures of eating and drinking, and playing with my dog and relaxing in front of the TV or computer. And as long as my body holds up, I will still remember to party.

I’m now turning 33 in December and how have I changed since I was 30? Erm, not much. I still view life as a meandering journey with no set destinations or timetable, and that the only things that matter are the journey itself and the people whose lives that I have touched and vice-versa.

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Ann, 52, USA
http://fromthefrontporch.com

There are many times I don’t even feel like a grown up – just a “kid” masquerading as a grown up.

I often get mistaken for being much younger than I am. But I can see the changes – my face has certainly softened, widened, plenty of fine lines – I catch a glance in the mirror and wonder, “Who is that woman?”

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Beverly, 30, Saipan
http://www.bevecaba.blogspot.com

I used to say, I’d do things differently if I were in my 20’s again. Well I change my mind.

If I didn’t make those mistakes than I probably wouldn’t be where I am at today and I wouldn’t be who I am. What I learned from my 20’s is to lighten up and not take life so seriously.

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Liz, 36, USA

I turned 36 in June. I do not feel much different. When I turned 30, I was too busy taking care of a one year old to worry about it.

Maybe I will freak out when I turn 40. OMG, it is only four years away!

I think what finally hit me about turning 30 was buying our first house. There is nothing more than paying mortgage to make you feeling “old” and like a real adult.

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Melanie, 33, Australia

I can tell you that I didn’t bat an eyelid about turning 30 three years ago - in fact I was quite excited about it!

I truly believe that as a woman you are at your most beautiful in your early 30’s, that you are at some sort of peace with where you are in life and it shows in many ways.

Your outward appearance has grown from that of a 20 year old to be a little wiser and clearer, and you have more wisdom which is evident in the way you carry yourself and appear to others. And some may say women are at their sexual peak at this time, and I would concur with this suggestion also.

I have 2 beautiful children and although they are the hardest job you will ever love, they are also very rewarding and make me feel younger than I ever could had I not been blessed with these darling kids.

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Makiko, 28, US

I’m 28 and already feel like I’m in my 30’s!

When I hit the age of 30, my main thought will likely be, “That’s it? I’m still only 30?”

Since there’s no way of avoiding the inevitability of accumulating the years… I say embrace it. The sexiest 30-year olds that I’ve met are the ones who are accepting of their age.

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Judy, 29, Australia

I’m the most comfortable and content with who I am and what I’ve achieved in my life than I’ve ever been.

I know myself a lot better, I can see things clearer, I’ve accepted the greys in life, I’m grateful for all the people I’ve been blessed to share my life with, and I’m embracing life and myself just as it is.

But most of all, I feel peace.

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Heather, 29 ¾, USA

I turn thirty this September, and frankly I’ve been preparing for it all year. Since my last birthday, when asked my age I would reply, “Pushing thirty.”

Thirty is the new twenty : At thirty you’re still young and can have fun, but more secure with yourself than at twenty.

Perhaps my ambivalence comes from my childhood lens of thinking I would know life’s answers at thirty. Or perhaps it is because I haven’t met all my before-thirty-lifetime-milestones. In any case, I anticipate feeling a pang of loss when the first signs of fall appear. And maybe I’ll even sign up to run a marathon – I’ve already come this far.

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Carlene, 32, Singapore

Unlike my parents who married and started young, I’m only beginning to ‘settle down’ in my 30s.

My 20s happened so that I could enjoy my 30s. I started understanding that parents do know better, but we have to live our mistakes to learn from them.

I’m hoping my 30s is as enlightening as my 20s.

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Angel, 29, Singapore

How do I feel about being 30 next year? GREAT!! Cos I feel that I have always been what I wanted.

Though I am not working, I feel that mentally and spiritually I have accomplished much more than peers my age. I don’t think I want to trade any monetary gains or commercial recognition with what I have now.

I think what’s important for me is my family loving me, trusting me and being with me. I would want to travel round the world by the time I am 50. So, we are saving up for this elusive future that we all look forward to.

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