Archive for October 2003


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Reflections on Death

28 October 2003

It’s hard to think about death without thinking about life.

The sky seems bluer. Trees seem greener.
And the air seems fresher… somehow.
Maybe I’m just more aware that I’m alive today.

I take a moment to stand in my garden.
Trying to find a sense of stillness in my heart.

My plants seem to radiate a certain superiority about life.
“We do this life-death thing all the time” they seem to say.

I forget I’m part of a bigger world sometimes.

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Hon Hiew

27 October 2003

I got a phone call on Saturday morning. I was eating breakfast. A good friend of mine had passed away earlier that morning. He died in hospital from a heart condition. He was 29. He was with his family. It was sudden.

I was very upset.

Friend. Designer. Creative, good hearted, warm, funny person. Always told corny jokes. Always had a witty, snappy comeback. We shared a love of chinese food, designer geekness and daily messenger banter.

That night, I took a deep breath and clicked to his blog.
I procrastinated that moment all evening.

I had to look away for a few moments.
It was too….. something. Dunno. Too…. him?
Full of his daily thoughts, his humour, his pictures, his adventures with his mates, his cat and his geek toys.
I spent the next few hours taking snapshots of his site.
I was surprised at how much I cried.

Now, a few days later, I still feel numb.
My soul seems to lack feeling. Nothing, just heaviness.
A weight of sadness.
It doesn’t seem real.
I can’t believe he’s gone.
I miss him heaps.

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Stretch Marks During Pregnancy

24 October 2003

I was a bit concerned about getting stretch marks during pregnancy.

I wasn’t overly neurotic about it. But I figured there was no harm in being a bit proactive.

The literature on stretch marks was not helpful. They said there’s no guaranteed prevention for stretch marks. There are only things you can do to reduce the likelihood of them appearing.

When I was 3 months pregnant, I used cocoa butter cream 3 times a day. Morning. After a shower. And just before I slept. I LOVED the smell of cocoa butter. It was like rubbing chocolate all over your body. It was a yummy, calming, night time ritual.

I used The Body Shop Cocoa Butter Stick. Then I switched to Palmer’s Massage Cream for Stretch Marks.

Skin Flexibility!
I did a bit of yoga. I didn’t do classes. I bought a book and did it in my lounge room.

I drunk 2L of water per day. By the end of the pregnancy, my baby was pushing against my bladder that I had to pee every 15 minutes. It was ridiculous. So I had to reduce the amount of water I took.

As well as those special multi-vitamins for pregnant women, I took vitamin E and salmon oil. Apparently they are good for your skin.

I didn’t take any caffeine throughout my whole pregnancy! I was so proud of myself. They say too much caffeine is bad for your skin. They also say too much sugar is bad for your skin, but I wasn’t giving up my chocolate for anyone.

Eat Healthy! Be Healthy!
I ate healthy, balanced meals each day. My appetite increased, but I don’t think I OVER ate. And I was always within the average weight gain range.

I didn’t do any rigorous daily exercise, but I walked for an hour each day.

I bought myself non-underwire bras. And made sure I wore not-so-tight jeans.

In The End
For the whole 36 weeks I was stretch mark free. I thought I was home free.
The following week, either I put on weight suddenly or the baby dropped. My whole tummy, under my belly button was blazing with dark, purple, angry stretch marks.

I actually thought I’d be more upset about it, but I just shrugged and thought, “Ah shit. Oh well.”
A few days later, I had the baby. Baby was 2 weeks early. I weighed 60kgs (from my 47kgs).

Months following the birth, I used Bio Oil. 3 times a day.
I did tummy exercises and mild physio.

It took about 6-8 months for the stretch marks to fade. And even now, they’re not gone. I’m not exactly Miss Wash Board Tummy Swimsuit Model, but I guess things could have been worse. I still shrug and think, Oh well.

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Accident Prone

22 October 2003

Owwie-owwwwww. I’m such a klutz!!
I walked out the front door to get the mail
I tripped over my shoelaces
flew down the small flight of steps
and landed on my knees!

UGH. Now I have these awful purple bruises and scabby skin grazes on both knees. But what’s EVEN MORE terrible is…
I can’t wear a skirt this weekend! Grrr!

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Life as a first time mum

21 October 2003

I had lunch with a girlfriend in some groovy cafe in the city.
I ate a delicious spinach quiche and salad.
My 6 month Callum entertained himself with a metal teaspoon.
We talked about french manicures, brazillian waxes, children’s tv, swearing in front of babies and change-room etiquettes.
I also managed to squeeze in a bit of shoe shopping.

Then we went to visit my mum and dad.
My dad entertained Callum with an array of musical instruments : a guitar, piano, organ, harmonica, and a tin can.
Callum and I watched Shrek on DVD. He certainly didn’t understand any of it. We just zoned out and rested for a bit.

Then we chased the chickens around the backyard.
And spied on a family of ducks paddling in the pool.
We caught bugs.
We watered my mother’s orchids.
And we both had an hour nap.

After all that, we drove home – stopping to buy some rice.
Andrew was home early!
We drove to the river for a nice stroll in the evening.

We got home just in time to feed, bath and put Callum to bed.
I made baked crumbed fish fillets and a salad for dinner.
*I felt so healthy*
I watched TV.
Andrew did some work on the computer.

It was a very satisfying day.

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A Teaspoon of Lurve

20 October 2003

Mmmmm. I made Malaysian fish head curry for dinner.
I felt closer to becoming the Archetypal Asian Mother.

BUT I must admit, it didn’t have fish heads in it.
I would have been sleeping on the couch if it did.

It’s my only gripe about marrying a white man.

That I’d never be able to share my fish eye ball with the one I love.

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Callum – 6 Months

15 October 2003

Callum has two teeth!!

Now it hurts like hell when he chomps on my finger. AND when I feed him with a rubbery spoon he bites on it so hard that we’re constantly in a tug-o-war during meal times.

I was actually anticipating the whole “teething stage” to be quite awful. Andrew’s mother said that Andrew was a wonderful baby until he started teething… and then it all went to hell until he was… 12!

But in the end, Callum had a few grumbly hours over two days, which magically disappeared after a tiny bit of Baby Panadol. Breast feeding is still fine, so I might keep it up for a few more months.

Some relatives came down from Singapore and bought Callum a baby walker.

I’m not a big fan of walkers because apparently they make the baby lazy, and they stop trying to walk or crawl. But yes ok, it looks cool and it has provided some light entertainment for Callum a few minutes each day.

Babies seem to know the difference between kid’s toys and adult’s toys. Callum always prefers grabbing the remote control, digital camera, mobile phone, calculator and telephone.

They should really make kid’s toys in blacks, silvers and greys, instead of bold primary colours.

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Old House New House

7 October 2003

Deary me. What a hectic week this has been. As of today, our house is for sale.

It was such an emotional hurdle to decide to sell this place. My husband bought the house four years ago, a week before we met. It was a dump! I thought he was crazy. But he bought it with the intention of renovating it and selling it 5 years later.

He ripped out carpets, sanded and polished the floors, paved an area in the backyard, built a garden bench and fishpond under the tree, painted the walls and ceilings, paved and built a wall in the front yard, new kitchen, new bathroom, new doors, new front veranda, new driveway and yes, even new light switches. I saw everything old become new.

It’s funny how I’ve come to love the little bumps on the walls. The nooks in the woodwork. The little details on the ceiling. And the stain where I stumbled home one night and puked on the unpolished floor boards.

It’s strange to think this house will be someone else’s home. Or that someone might bulldoze it all down and build another house on it.

A few months ago, that thought would’ve made me really upset. But today as we sat in our living room, I signed on the dotted line and I felt like I was 7 years old again… leaning over the edge of the creek, letting go of my paper boat and watching it be carried far away. Letting go.

I’m very much at peace that we’ve decided to let go of this house and move on. I’m EXTREMELY excited and happy and looking forward to creating a new home.

So getting on with the story…

We found our NEW house almost by accident!

It was 1pm. We happened to be driving around. We saw a “For Sale” sign in front of a smallish house. I wasn’t too keen to see it. We called the number on the sign. The agent drove over and met us at 2pm. We walked around and instantly fell in love with the house. We made an offer. Made a few phone calls. And we owned it by 6pm!

It has 3 large bedrooms, 1 office, 2 bathrooms, living room, formal dinning room, kitchen/meals room, enclosed outdoor patio, garden gazebo + bbq area, established garden, a shed, parking for 3 cars, a 1 minute walk from gorgeous parklands, 5 minutes walk from the primary school, 10 minutes walk from shops, AND it’s at the end of a cul-de-sac!


It’s so weird. But I’m so excited!

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Weekend Wedding

5 October 2003

Over the weekend some good friends of mine got married.
The spring weather was just divine.
Ceremony at Sunken Gardens at UWA.
Reception at the Old Swan Brewery.
I wore the wrong shoes for a garden wedding.
There was someone playing a HARP.

The people at the Brewery thought Andrew was a movie star.
The speeches were very funny.
Andrew was allergic to the entree.
I drank a whole glass of champagne!
I spent most of the evening making song requests.
The groom danced a little TOO well for an Asian guy.
I got to take home our table’s centre piece.
And some crazy passerby took a crooked pic of us.

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3 October 2003


I’m still in shock.

We saw it at 2pm, and it was ours by 6pm.

And now I can’t write because I’m all giggly with excitement!

We’re off to celebrate! 8D

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Growning Up. Me, that is.

2 October 2003

We hosted a dinner party – if you can call pizza and beer a “dinner party” – for 6 of my oldest and best friends and their partners. We’ve all known each other since we were kids. It’s funny. We’re all growing up. Engaged. Getting married.  Buying a house. Starting a family. It’s all happening.

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Callum – 5.5 Months

1 October 2003