Archive for May 2003


day of week

Mum’s Groups

29 May 2003

It was such a beautiful sunny day today.

I walked to my mother’s group. With Callum in a carrier. And with my heart a little heavy. I haven’t been enjoying my group.

Basically if you’re a new mum, the community automatically signs you up to your local community child health clinic. They hold classes about how to look after your baby and offer a whole range of support. You wear a name tag for you and your baby. You chat to other mums. You drink tea. It sounds great in theory.

But there’s something about my class. Well, the people, not the class itself. I can’t put my finger on it. I felt out of place. I felt young, too naive, too happy and too self confident? It sounds weird. It felt like a stereotypical support group you’d see in the movies. You know, a bunch of crusty women in a dark, musty room, bitching about their husbands, their family, their life, and how dreadful and terrible everything is.

I felt like I didn’t belong. I actually felt bad that I didn’t have any stories of hardship and stress to contribute to the group. It felt as if everyone wanted to wallow in their problems to reassure themselves that the world is a terrible place. It was bubbling with negative vibes.

Yeah I know. I shouldn’t be hard on them. Lots of people go through depression and bumps in life, especially after giving birth. I shouldn’t go around imposing my views on people.

But… I think the negative company is not good for my soul. And drawing strength and creating strongholds from other people’s contempt will darken my heart. So I’m probably going to find a new mum’s group.

day of week

Morning Perve

23 May 2003

So I was feeding Callum this morning. 9am. Turned on the tv.
And there was this super cute asian guy on tv!
It’s been a while since I’ve seen a cute asian boy on tv.

Only problem was. He was holding a storybook.
And singing Incy-Wincy Spider with a puppet.

day of week

New Hair Cut

22 May 2003

day of week

Up For Air

21 May 2003

OOoOoOOoh!! Callum lifted his head today!
I’m going all loopy with excitement!
Hehehe. Look at that concentration!

Gaaaawd, I’m going to DIE from this cuteness overload.

day of week


20 May 2003

Someone told me I shouldn’t colour my hair while pregnant. I didn’t really know whether it was true or not, but I wasn’t going to take the chance.

So after 10 months of waiting, I’ve FINALLY had a haircut!

I decided to splurge and go for the whole shampoo, cut, blow dry, and colour. The whole thing took about 2.5 hours and $80. I asked for a “CHOCOLATE” colour. But it came out orangey brown. You know, that rusty colour when you bleach Asian hair. Ick. I was so NOT impressed.
The cut was fine. Quite nice actually. But I looked like an asian gangster chick.

I wrinkled my nose and told her, “It’s not exactly the colour I had in mind.” She tried to make some excuse about it being a “light chocolate”. Then she said I could come in another day to put another colour through it for 50% off. Er, and have you do another crap job? I thought. I ran into pharmacy and bought some do-it-yourself hair colour. Ugh. I hope I can cover it up.

I know I’ve said this before… but I really need to find myself a nice gay, male hairdresser who will squeal with delight when he sees me and who will love my hair more than I do.

day of week

Home Alone. Kinda.

19 May 2003

I know I have a newborn baby.

But cooking for one sucks.

I miss my husband.

day of week

Single For A Week

18 May 2003

Andrew left for rainy Melbourne today.

He’ll be gone for 6 days!! 6 WHOLE DAYS. For a conference. This will be the longest we’ve ever been apart. It’s a bizarre thought. You expect couples to need space and “time apart”. But here I am. Two hours after kissing him goodbye at the airport and already I’m amazed at how empty my life feels.

Anyway, despite me being husband-less for a week, over the next few days I’m hoping to get out and about and establish a nice routine for the coming winter.

I haven’t made any solid plans yet, just a todo list —
Watch movies. Girly shopping. Cafe culture. Dinner parties. Video/DVD nights. Pizza + beer nights. Haircut. Yoga classes. Walks by the river. Read more books. Experimental cooking.

day of week

Chocolate Surprise

16 May 2003

I love going back to my parents place to eat dinner.

Thing I love most is —
Their pantry is ALWAYS stuffed with peanuts, chocolates, chinese cookies, muesli bars, little bags of chips, instant soup sachets, tim tams, tea biscuits, date loaves, cinnamon buns, dried fruit, honey-baked cashews… the list goes on and on. And I just love poking my head into the dark musty pantry and digging around in the dark corners, behind boxes, inside jars, unwrapping bags and on top of containers. It’s like digging for gold.

So tonight, we ate my mother’s most delicious chicken rice yet. Especially when Mr Chicken was running around in the backyard a few hours earlier.

Dessert was a fresh fruit salad. Topped off with some crumbley peanut cookies. Everyone was stuffed. But not meee. Not Miss Needs-to-Breastfeed!

I pulled out a mysterious dark box of Hand Crafted Chocolates that I spied during my pantry treasure hunt. No one wanted to enjoy it with me.

I peeled open the wrapper and breathed in the mix of soaking rich velvety aromas. They were immaculate. I took my time in selecting which miniature chocolate sculpture I wanted to pop into my mouth.

I chose the white chocolate ball covered with a lavish coat of coconut and licked it with my tongue. Mmmm, coconut and white chocolate is just divine.

I passed the tray of chocolates on. Just to be polite.
As I was about to devour the ball between my fingers… my sister said,
“Hmm, this one looks like it’s already been eaten–”
I looked down into the little paper cup that held my chocolate and I saw a puddle of wriggling maggots.


day of week

Colours For Today

15 May 2003

I was inspired to share some colours with everyone…

The budding blossoms of my lemon tree?

Or perhaps the autumn leaves scattered across my lawn?

Alas, never have I paid such close attention to

the poo that comes out of my baby’s bottom.

day of week

Callum – 4 weeks

13 May 2003

Callum being a wriggle-bum.

day of week

Mother’s Day

11 May 2003

It took a while for it to sink in.

I flipped through glossy catalogs that filled my letter box. Candles, pyjamas, bath robes, bath oils, bath bombs, picture frames, perfumes, nail polish, underwear, food processors, microwaves, irons, cake mixers. Mother’s Day presents. It begins today.

I’m on the receiving end of catalog Mother’s Day shit. My kitchen cupboards are going to be filled with electrical appliances that I only use once a year. My shelves are going to be cluttered with porcelain ornaments from Target. The new bear-patterned pyjamas will hang between the floral-patterned pyjamas and the striped-patterned pyjamas.

Oh I’m being such a wuss. Truth is, I’m in denial. I’m still trying to discover what it means (to me) to be a mum. And it’s only been 4 weeks.

I have a feeling that, over time, I will succumb to the soppiness of Mother’s Day.

I know that because when Callum comes home with his first painting of My Mum… someone will be turning into a puddle of goo.

day of week

What’s in a Name?

1 May 2003

Ok how weird is this.

I’m filling out the Birth Registration Form for Callum, and this is what it says:

Naming a child is a matter of choice. For your child’s surname you can use the mother’s surname, the father’s surname, a combination of the two or any other surname. You many not choose a name that is obscene, offensive, unreasonably long or contrary to public interest.

What kind of rule is THAT?

But perhaps the real question is, how come I haven’t heard of any strangely named people?