It’s finally caught up with me.
Callum was a bit grumbly last night, so from 2am to 7am I was feeding, playing, burping, pacing, bouncing, circling, cuddling, rocking, anything to try to put him to bed. He ended up sleeping on my chest for 30 minutes. He looked so cute and content. My husband took the day-morning shift, so I managed to catch up on sleep from 8am to 12pm. I feel great now. But I’m all out of whack with the rest of the world.
This day-time zombie feeling reminds me of my uni days – sleep at day, play at the night. It didn’t quite work out when I had day classes to attend though. I used to love the quiet existance at 4am. Street lights buzzing. No birds. No cars. No people. No colours. Just the moon crawling across a black sky full of stars. I used to love driving at night. Through the empty streets and past the ghostly shadows. I loved to drown myself in the silence – surrounded by my thoughts, dreams and fantasies.
But how things change. I think having a job quickly put things into perspective. Getting married, having a baby. Now I can’t imagine wasting away my days. There’s so much to do and see. So much to live for. So much to love.